It’s Oscar weekend, so here are the very serious Birchtree awards for movies I watched in 2023 that didn’t come out in 2023.

Biggest Emotional Gut Punch That Makes You Think Deeply About Your Life and Loved Ones

Macrel the Shell with Shoes On

Biggest “It Really Holds Up” Rewarch

The Royal Tennenbaums

Worst “Oh No, It Doesn’t Hold Up” Rewatch

Drag Me to Hell

Movie I Knew Was Great, but Didn’t Realize How Great Until This Rewatch

The Terminator

Best Picture That No One Will Believe Because It’s Directed By Michael Bay

Ambulance

Biggest Letdown That Everyone Seems to Love

Triangle of Sadness

Straight Up Worst Movie

Ghost Ship

Best Picture That Looks Like It Would Be Boring, but Trust Me It’s Spectacular

The Father

Best “Mulholland Drive” But It’s Anime

Perfect Blue

Review That I Got the Most Hate For Calling “Okay”

Air Force One

Franchise That Manages To Get Worse Every Single Installment

Jurassic Park/World

Movie From My Childhood I Thought Wouldn’t Hold Up But Actually Was Decent Fun

The Mummy

Best Godzilla Movie, No Not the One that Came Out This Year

Shin Godzilla

Best Film That’s So Good I Can Ignore How Bad It’s Last 20 Minutes Are

Sunshine